This isn't going to cost me anything, is it?
2006-03-10 - 4:09 p.m.

I don't know if this counts as a "proud parent" moment, but Will now knows not to start to bang his head until the whistle blows at the beginning of Paradise City.

Yep. That's my boy!

Haven't written much because not much has happened. I have mostly been sitting on my butt, waiting for my knee to get better. Oh, and bleeding money. Every time someone has looked at us sideways these past couple weeks it has cost us many hundreds of dollars. $1200 into one car, $800 into the other, $663 into my mouth (this crown OUGHT to be made of gold for that), $340 into the oil tank. AGAIN. Thank goodness the heating season is almost over. And thank goodness for medical insurance, because the sum total cost of my knee surgery to us is $10, five of which went to my PCP for my initial office visit and five of which went to the orthopedist for the consult.

It's good to find a silver lining because right now, we're up to our eyeballs in owing people cash. SOme months, it just seems like the bills come out of the woodwork. My mom looks at me and laughs, shaking her head as she remembers her own "lean years." I choose to take that as a sign that eventually it will get better.

In the dreaming-about-making-a-ridiculous-amount-of-money category, I've actually got an outline sketched for a story I want to write. I'm a little afraid to start filling in the spaces, though. Afraid because the whole story came to me at once in a way that has only happened to me once before, when I had to write a short story for an English assignment in 10th grade and I finished the whole thing in one sitting and the end result was published in our school's literary magazine and won me a prize and a way into the AP English class. Afraid because I think it has the potential to be something really good. And I'm not sure I'm ready to deal with the fallout from that. Because it could be good enough for someone to publish it, and then it would be out there on display for anyone to read, and the heart of the story, the two main characters, are very close to my heart. I'm not sure what would come of putting this particular story out there. People would recognize them for who they are, and although the story is not truth, the characters are only loosly dressed in fiction, and I'm not sure I'm ready for that.

Or maybe I'm just a big chicken.


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